Funny joke about Lettuce, Egg And Cat Food

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This is a funny food joke about joke and lettuce. We hope you have a laugh - and as always, keep smiling.

I hope you enjoy this funny story - and if you do, why not send it to a friend? If the answer is: "Because I want to keep them" - then that's awesome, too. Keep reading Douglas Adams.

This joke may be considered ADULT and either contains adult themes, bad language, or racially sensitive humour.

Lettuce, Egg And Cat Food

Ruthie was enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening.

"Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He's going to be really ticked if it's not ready on time! " she exclaimed. When she got home, she realized that she didn't have enough time to go to the supermarket, and all she had in the cupboard was a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg, and a can of cat food. In a panic, she opened the can of cat food, stirred in the egg, and garnished it with the lettuce leaf just as her husband pulled up.

She greeted him and then watched in horror as he sat down to his dinner. To her surprise, her husband really enjoyed his dinner.

"Ruthie, this is the best dinner you have made for me in forty years of marriage. You can make this for me any old day."

Needless to say, every bridge night from then on, Ruthie made her husband the same dish. She told her bridge cronies about it and they were all horrified.

"You're going to kill him! " they exclaimed.

Two months later, her husband died. Her bridge cronies came around to pay their respects and while they were sitting around the kitchen table one of them said, "You killed him! We told you that feeding him that cat food every week would do him in! How can you just sit there so calmly drinking tea knowing you murdered your husband? Ruthie stoically replied, "I didn't kill him. He fell off the mantel while he was licking his butt."

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